Is Your Bridal Gown Gay?

Include Sarah Carson Cloud’s photo in a line-up of this summers most stunning brides and few could guess she was the gay wed one.

Her gown, the “Priscilla” by Michelle Rahn, was “old school, classic glamour.” Her French netting veil, designed by Sara Gabriel, was worn over her eyes during the ceremony and as a “poof” during the reception. Her shoes, by Miu Miu, were “like diamond encrusted slippers.”

None of these choices emit obvious “gaydar” rays. She’s got a few well-placed tattoos but that’s hardly surprising on a young fashion designer whose “Leota” line of 50’s- inspired dresses will arrive in stores this spring. And tats are omnipresent in Prospect Heights where she wed her partner of two years — Robin Carson Cloud — in the historic but trendy Brooklyn Botanic Gardens.

Here’s what Sarah had to say when I asked if her fashion choices were influenced by the fact that she was marrying a woman, “I admire classic beauty and old-school glamour, but I keep it safely non-normative because I’m gay, and I’m dressing for Robin.”

In Sarah’s statement, I find the nugget that describes how and why your old pal dapperQ has over the past year, become someone you might turn to for wedding fashion advice.

I didn’t graduate from FIT and frankly, if unable to access Google, can’t tell you the difference between a sheath and a mermaid silhouette. I love to look swanky but, until recently, couldn’t have told you the difference between a brogue and oxford.

What I have learned over the past year — as the founder of, a site for those of us “transgressing men’s fashion” — is more about what it takes to walk regally through this straight world. Hundreds of readers have shared with me the challenges they face in aligning what they feel on the inside with what they wear on the outside. I’ve been heartened to learn that I am not alone and I am eager to share good news.

As you prepare for the biggest day of your life, we both know you haven’t taken the easy road. Hopefully, as you prepare to wed the one who gives meaning to your choices, you will take this as an opportunity to gain an even deeper understand of your wild beauty — forged under intense fire.

You may want a traditional look for your wedding, but you aren’t traditional. Like Sarah, you are transgressing bridal fashion. In this early phase of marriage equality, you are also a pioneer establishing traditions that will long endure.

Sarah told me, “When we invited friends and family to our wedding, we were becoming part of a traditional legacy of relationships. We wanted it to be clear why we deserve the Cuisinart.”

Find the ever-so-right gay wedding outfit and you might just get yourself a gay blender, too.

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  • I’ve always thought that the Brooklyn Botanic Gardens would be a wonderful place to get married. It’s probably my favorite place in the hood. Gorgeous couple!

  • Her dress is beautiful: simple, classic & elegant. The hair & flowers are also a great compliment 🙂

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